A Harm Reduction Approach to Infidelity: The Benefits of Seeing a Professional Companion
Harm reduction is a set of practical strategies aimed at reducing the negative consequences associated with risky behaviors. While commonly applied to substance use, the principles of harm reduction can extend to other areas of life - including relationships and intimacy.
The reality is that many people in committed relationships do experience desires for extramarital intimacy at some point. The reasons are varied and complex - from sexual incompatibility to unmet emotional needs to sheer curiosity. When someone chooses to act on these urges, seeing a professional companion may actually be the least harmful option for all involved.
A tantric provider or professional companion is trained in holding clear boundaries, both physical and emotional. They can provide a safe, discreet outlet for the client to explore sensual and sexual expression without the risk of getting emotionally entangled. This helps protect the primary relationship from the turmoil of an affair with a friend, coworker or acquaintance.
Reputable companions also take sexual health extremely seriously, engaging in regular STI screenings and safer sex practices. This reduces the risk of the client contracting an infection and bringing it home to their partner.
Additionally, connecting with a provider is a time-limited experience with a clear end point. Unlike an affair which can take on a life of its own, sessions with a professional allow the client to compartmentalize and contain the experience. It doesn't impinge on family time or obligations.
To be clear, seeing a companion is not a replacement for doing the difficult work of examining and communicating about the challenges in a relationship. Couples therapy, improved dialogue, and rebuilding trust are essential.
However, if someone is grappling with the near-overwhelming compulsion to stray, harm reduction means finding the least destructive path forward. Repressing the urge entirely often backfires. In my practice, I've seen many clients channel the insights and sexual healing they experience with me back into renewed intimacy with their spouse - and conclude our work together feeling more wholeheartedly dedicated to their marriage.
While society may cast judgment, the reality of sex and relationships is rarely black and white. For the person who feels trapped between their desires and their commitments, seeing a caring professional may provide the most ethical, responsible outlet. It's harm reduction - not a solution, but a safer choice that minimizes risk for all parties involved.
